Treatment Goals and Treatment Plan for Pathological Buying Behavior

What We Want to Achieve Together

If you suffer from pathological buying behavior, you probably already know how distressing this condition can be. The good news is: shopping addiction is treatable, and there are effective ways out. In therapy, we work on helping you regain control over your buying behavior and lead a more satisfying life.

Our main goals are:

Regaining control: You learn to recognize buying impulses and no longer be helplessly at their mercy. Unplanned purchases become significantly less frequent.

Finding new ways to deal with emotions: Instead of trying to feel better through shopping, you develop healthier strategies for difficult moments.

Regaining financial security: Together we create a realistic financial plan and work on reducing existing debt.

Feeling better again: The guilt and shame after buying diminish. You regain inner peace.

Beyond this, we work on ensuring your self-worth no longer depends on purchases or possessions, that you can cope better with stress, and that you build a sustainable social network around you.

How Therapy Works

Treatment for shopping addiction doesn't follow a rigid scheme. Every person is different, and that's why we adapt the therapy path individually to your situation. We work on some topics sequentially, others in parallel – depending on what's currently important for you.

Understanding What's Happening

Understanding comes first. Together we look at how your shopping addiction developed: When did it start? What are your personal triggers? In which situations does the urge to buy become particularly strong?

I explain to you how shopping addiction works – how the vicious cycle of stress, buying impulse, short-term relief, and subsequent regret keeps spinning. This understanding is important because when you know the mechanisms, you can break them.

We also discuss very practically what shopping addiction means for you: What hopes do you connect with a change? What would improve in your life? This clarity about your own goals gives you strength for the journey.

Gaining Overview

An important first step is learning to observe yourself better. For this, you keep a shopping diary – don't worry, it's easier than it sounds. You simply note: When do I buy? What do I feel beforehand? What do I think? What do I buy? And how do I feel afterward?

When we look at this diary together, you discover patterns you may not have been aware of before. Perhaps you buy especially on weekends? Or always when you're stressed? Or after conflicts? These insights are valuable because they show us where we can intervene.

Defusing Situations

When we know your personal risk situations, we can take targeted countermeasures. An important approach is to reduce temptations from the outset. This can practically mean:

Unsubscribing from advertising newsletters, deleting shopping apps from your phone, taking different routes to work that don't pass by stores. Perhaps you give your credit card to a trusted person or only use cash to get a better sense of your spending.

This isn't patronizing, but a smart strategy. You make it easier for yourself by removing stumbling blocks.

Learning to Stop Impulses

Of course, you can't avoid all buying situations. That's why you learn concrete techniques for how to deal with buying impulses when they occur.

A proven method is the 48-hour rule: Nothing is bought spontaneously; instead, you always wait at least two days. You'll be surprised how often the desire simply disappears during this time.

We also practice the stop technique: When you feel a buying impulse, you consciously pause, say "Stop!" internally, and leave the situation. Or you distract yourself – call someone, go for a walk, do something with your hands.

Such techniques sound simple at first, but they need practice. That's why we also train them in role-plays or during accompanied shopping trips, so you can fall back on them in emergencies.

Coping with Emotions Differently

For many people with shopping addiction, shopping is a way to deal with unpleasant feelings. They feel empty, lonely, stressed, or sad – and buy something to feel better. This works short-term but makes everything worse long-term.

That's why it's so important to find other ways to deal with difficult emotions. We look at: What exactly do you actually feel? Can you distinguish different feelings from each other? And then: What do you really need in this moment?

You learn various techniques that can help: breathing exercises when you're tense. Progressive muscle relaxation when stress becomes too much. Mindfulness exercises to arrive in the present moment instead of sinking into worries.

Together we put together your personal "emergency kit" – a collection of strategies you can fall back on when you're feeling bad.

Discovering New Sources of Joy

If shopping should no longer be your main source of good feelings, you need alternatives. We develop a list of things that give you joy or used to give you joy: exercising, meeting friends, being creative, being in nature, reading, listening to music, meditating.

Then it's about concretely incorporating these activities into your daily life. This is especially important for critical times – Friday evening, the weekend, the day after a stressful workday. We plan together how you can fill these times with meaningful and pleasant things.

You also learn to reward yourself without buying something. A reward can be: taking time for yourself, doing something special, consciously treating yourself to something that costs nothing – an extended bath, a walk at sunset, a phone call with a loved one.

Questioning Thoughts

Our thoughts have great influence on our behavior. With shopping addiction, there are often typical thoughts that fuel buying: "I deserve it," "This makes me happy," "I absolutely need this," "It's on sale, it would be stupid not to buy it."

We look at such thoughts closely and question them: Is that really true? Did the last purchase actually make you happy – and if so, for how long? Do you really need it? Or is that just a feeling?

You learn to recognize such thoughts and replace them with more realistic ones. For example: "I'm feeling bad right now and believe a purchase will help – but I know I'll feel even worse afterward. I can also do something else."

We also work on how you think about yourself, especially when it comes to your self-worth. Many people with shopping addiction have the feeling they become more valuable through purchases or possessions. This is an illusion, but a persistent one. Together we develop a healthier self-image.

Working on Self-Worth

Behind shopping addiction often hides fragile self-worth. Perhaps you have the feeling you're only valuable with the right things, the right clothes, or the right appearance. Perhaps you're trying to fill an inner void through purchases.

In therapy we look at where these self-worth problems come from. We identify your real strengths and qualities – they have nothing to do with possessions. We work on helping you value yourself more, just as you are.

You also learn to become more independent from others' opinions. It's okay if not everyone likes or admires you. Your worth doesn't depend on what others think or what you have.

Understanding Biographical Roots

Sometimes it helps to look further into the past. How was it with money and consumption in your family? Were you rewarded or comforted with gifts as a child? Was there scarcity you now want to compensate for? Or was consumption always an important topic?

We also look at deeper emotional issues: Is there a feeling of inner emptiness? Do you often feel lonely? Were there losses or injuries in your life that haven't been processed?

This work is sometimes painful but also liberating. When you understand where your shopping addiction comes from, it loses some of its power over you. And we can work more specifically on the real problems, not just the symptoms.

Strengthening Relationships

Loneliness and social isolation are often part of the problem with shopping addiction. Perhaps you've withdrawn because you're ashamed. Perhaps relationships have broken because of financial problems or because of lies about your buying behavior.

We look at your social relationships: What sustainable relationships do you have? Where do you want more closeness? What social support do you need?

If necessary, we also train social skills: How can you communicate better? How can you say no? How do you resolve conflicts? How do you build new contacts?

Real human connections are an important source of joy in life and self-worth – much more sustainable than any purchase.

Getting Finances Under Control

Shopping addiction usually leads to financial problems, and these problems create stress, which in turn tempts you to buy. We must break this vicious cycle.

Together we create clarity about your financial situation: What debts exist? What income and expenses do you have? Then we create a realistic plan: How much can you spend on what? How can you reduce debt?

If necessary, I'll also refer you to professional debt counseling. Sometimes the financial problems are so large that specialized help makes sense.

We also work on helping you develop a healthier relationship with money. Money isn't your worth. It's also not the solution to all problems. It's a means of living, nothing more and nothing less.

Preventing Relapses

Change is rarely a straight path. It may be that you have a relapse in between. That's not bad – it's part of the process. What's important is that you learn from it and continue.

We develop a concrete relapse prevention plan: What are your personal warning signals? Which situations are particularly risky? What can you do in such moments? Who can you call?

You also learn how to deal with a relapse if it happens: don't give up, don't sink into self-reproach, but analyze what happened and quickly return to helpful behavior.

Support from Others

You don't have to go this path alone. I recommend combination therapy with individual therapy and group therapy. There you meet people who have similar experiences. This can be very relieving – you realize you're not alone and that others have succeeded.

Your private environment can also be important. If you wish, we can involve relatives – partners, family – in the therapy. They can learn how to best support you, and we can work through conflicts that arose from the shopping addiction.

Other Psychological Burdens

Shopping addiction often occurs together with other psychological problems – frequently with depression or anxiety disorders. If that's the case for you, we also treat these problems. Sometimes additional psychiatric support makes sense, especially if medication could be helpful.

It's important to see the whole person, not just the shopping addiction. Because often everything is connected, and when we intervene at multiple points, the situation improves significantly.

How We Monitor Success

During therapy, we regularly check how you're doing and whether we're on the right track. For this we use various means:

At certain intervals you fill out the shopping addiction questionnaire again – this way we can objectively see if something is improving. Your shopping diary shows us whether you're buying less frequently, whether expenses are decreasing, and whether your feelings are changing. We talk about how you're doing, whether the level of distress is decreasing, and whether you can apply the learned strategies in everyday life.

These regular reviews help us adjust the therapy plan. If something isn't working, we try something else. If you're particularly struggling at one point, we put more emphasis there.

An Individual Path

This therapy plan is a framework, not a rigid program. Every person is different, every shopping addiction has its own facets. That's why we adapt everything individually to you.

Some people need practical behavioral control at the beginning above all, others must first work on their emotions. Some have severe financial problems that urgently need attention; for others, self-worth work is in the foreground.

What's important: You're not a passive recipient of therapy but an active shaper of your path. Your experiences, your needs, your pace determine how we proceed.